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Zanimaju me opširniji propisi u vezi zaruka?

               
Pitanje: Es-selamu alejkum, poštovana braćo! Zanima me nešto u vezi zaruka, odnosno  neki opširniji propisi u vezi zaruka. Nešto sam pročitala i na vašoj stranici, ali još me zanima da li mladić koji želi da zaruči djevojku treba da je zaruči uz njeno prisustvo? Kojim riječima mladić treba da zaruči djevojku? Kako djevojka da kaže svome ocu da odreðeni mladić želi da je zaruči? Molim Allaha, s.v.t., da vas nagradi za vaš trud!
 
Odgovor: Hvala Allahu i neka selam i salavat na Njegovog Poslanika. Prije svega treba reći da je prošnja čin kojim muškarac nudi brak djevojci, a islamski pravnici smatraju da je prošnja šerijatski utemeljen čin. Allah, s.v.t., kaže: ‘’Nema grijeha u onome što ste naumili od prošnje žena.’’ (El-Bekare, 235.)
Prenosi se da je Allahov Poslanik, sallallahu alejhi ve sellem, zaprosio Aišu, r.a. (Sahihul-Buhari, Poglavlje o braku, br. 4793.), kao i to da je zaprosio Hafsu (Sahihul-Buhari, Poglavlje o braku, br. 4830.).
Allahov Poslanik, sallallahu alejhi ve sellem, podsticao je mladića koji želi da se oženi nekom ženom da je vidi:  ‘’Ako neko od vas zaprosi djevojku, neka pogleda u ono što će ga navesti da je oženi.’’ (Ebu Davud, Poglavlje o braku br. 2082, a šejh Albani ga je ocijenio vjerodostojnim pod brojem 1832.)
Shodno tome, ne postoje šerijatski odreðeni propisi vezani za prošnju. Postupci pojedinih muslimana kada je u pitanju prošnja: obznanjivanje prošnje ili zaruka, razmjenjivanje poklona i pripremanje veselja – predstavljaju običaje koji su u suštini dopušteni, osim onoga što se kosi sa šerijatom, kao što je razmjena prstenja izmeðu mladenaca i što se naziva ‘burmom’. Naime, ljudi su ubijeðeni da ovi prstenovi jačaju ljubav meðu supružnicima, a ovakvo ubjeðenje je pagansko jer nema nikakvog utemeljenja u šerijatu.
Takoðer, ovakav čin predstavlja oponašanje nevjernika u njihovim običajima. Allahov Poslanik, sallallahu alejhi ve sellem, kaže: ‘’Ko bude oponašao jedan narod, on njemu i pripada.’’ (Davud, Poglavlje o odjeći, br. 4031. Šejh Albani ga je ocijenio vjerodostojnim pod brojem 3401.)
U većini slučajeva običaj je da prilikom zaruka muškarac stavi ‘burmu’ djevojci na prst, što je haram, jer je ona samo njegova buduća žena, ali ne i zvanično, zbog toga im ni dodirivanje nije dopušteno.
Nije obaveza da mladić isprosi djevojku u njenom prisustvu, jer je to moguće učiniti prošnjom od njenog staratelja, oca, djeda, brata i amidže, ili opunomoćenjem, dok brak može da ponudi i ona ili njen staratelj. Riječi koje se izgovaraju tom prilikom su stvar običaja, kao ‘’zaprosio bih’’, ‘’tražim vaše odobrenje za brak’’ i tome slično. A što se tiče toga kako će djevojka prenijeti ocu da je neki mladić želi zaprositi, takoðer je stvar odnosa izmeðu roditelja i djeteta. Ponekad je najbolje da to učini majka, nekada je bolje reći indirektno, a isto tako se može tragati za najboljim trenutkom ili najbližom osobom koja to može reći ocu. Ali zaruke ili prošnja uglavnom su popraćeni običajima: najavljenom posjetom njegovog oca ili nekolicine muškaraca sa ciljem prosidbe.
Allah najbolje zna.
Odgovorio: Harmin Suljić
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