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Kome pripada pravo starateljstva nad djetetom nakon razvoda braka?

            
Pitanje: Es-selamu alejkum! Ako žena ima muško dijete iz prvog braka, pa se ponovo uda, kome pripada to dijete, majci ili ocu? Ima li dijete pravo da odluči gdje će živjeti, kod majke ili oca, od koje starosne dobi dijete može da odlučuje? Zanima me tačan stav po ovome pitanju…
 
Odgovor: Najbolji oblik odgoja djeteta je u okrilju oba roditelja, jer dijete pomoću njihove zajedničke pažnje i odgoja postaje kompletna i uravnotežena ličnost. Ukoliko se roditelji rastave, majka je preča od oca da se brine o djetetu, osim ako se kod majke pojavi zapreka ili kod djeteta osobina koja nalaže da mu se ponudi izbor izmeðu majke i oca.
Povod za davanje prednosti majci u odgoju djeteta je činjenica da se majka u osnovi stara, pazi i doji dijete. Ona najbolje zna kako ga odgojiti i ima više strpljenja i upornosti od samoga muškarca. Takoðer, majka ima više vremena od oca, pa joj se s tim razlozima daje prednost sa aspekta veće koristi koje će dijete zadobiti.
Od Abdullaha b. Amra prenosi se da je neka žena rekla: ”Allahov Poslaniče, ovaj moj sin bio je u mom stomaku, moje grudi su ga dojile, a njegov otac tvrdi da će mi ga uzeti!?” Poslanik, s.a.v.s., reče: ”Ti si preča tom djetetu, osim ako se udaš.” (Ahmed, 2/182: Ebu Davud, 2276; El-Hakim, 2/225 i kaže da je sahih)
Od Jahjaa b. Seida prenosi se da je čuo El-Kasima b. Muhammeda kako govori: ”Kod Omera b. el-Hattaba bila je jedna žena ensarijka koja mu je rodila Asima b. Omera, pa ju je Omer pustio. Jednom prilikom Omer je došao u mjesto Kuba’ i našao svoga sina u dvorištu džamije. Uzeo ga je za mišice i stavio ga ispred sebe na jahalicu. Djetetova nena po majci ih sustiže i poče se sa njim prepirati sve dok ne doðoše do Ebu Bekra es-Siddika.
Omer reče: ”Ovo je moj sin”, a Ebu Bekr reče: ”Pusti ih neka idu (nena i dijete).” Omer ga više nije ništa pitao. (Malik u El-Muvattau, 2/767, i El-Bejheki, 8/5) Ovu predaju učenjaci su prihvatali iz svih predaja, bile prekinute ili spojenog lanca prenosilaca.     
U jednoj od tih predaja navodi se da je Ebu Bekr rekao Omeru: ”Majka je brižnija, blaža, duševnija i bolja za svoje dijete, ako se ne uda.”
Ove Ebu Bekrove riječi pojašnjavaju nam razlog za davanje prednosti majci u brizi o djetetu ukoliko su roditelji rastavljeni.
Nije dozvoljeno predati brigu o djetetu nemuslimanki, jer nemuslimani nemaju pravo starateljstva nad muslimanima, bilo da se radi o majci ili ocu.
Sa otprilike navršenih sedam godina djeteta i njegovom sposobnošću da samostalno jede i izvršava druge obaveze prestaje propis njegove dodjele majci, te se tada daje djetetu pravo na izbor izmeðu života sa ocem ili majkom, bez ikakve prisile ili uvjetovanja. Takoðer, djetetovo opredjeljenje ne smije biti motivirano izbjegavanjem šerijatskih propisa kao što su namaz, hidžab, post i sl. Allah najbolje zna.
 
Odgovorio: Emir Demir, prof.
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